Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Put Your Knife Bag Where Your Mouth Is, Part 2


I left you at Ludobites where I am in such a good mood when I get home that Nick gets lucky. A scallop hooks him UP.

I get some Pop Rocks and throw them on top of Evan's berries & whip cream. Read all the blogs about LB 4.0 to see what I've been missing up here in the tower. Start randomly twittering Krissy about volunteering.

Then I twitter some more.

And some more.
I say I will do anything to work for them. I am doing what I consider to be grovelling but I don't care. I really want to get in that kitchen.

I keep waiting for her to politely decline my offer. I take not saying yes as not saying no. Think that at some point she will either cave or block me.
I have never done this for a man or a job, let alone for the opportunity to clean walls for free if that's what it takes.
The soup was THAT good.

I get a message from Krissy inquiring about my interest and hear nothing back. I read tweets about the staffing being done and I think, Oh well, if I can't work, at least I can eat there.

By the time the next set of reservations goes online, their fan base has tripled. When the announcement comes I get a sick feeling. Our internet is as slow as my dead grandma and there are people with their own servers determined to get a Golden Ticket.

I make Nick come home from work early so that he can take Evan to the park and I log on to all four computers to try my hand at the lottery. Failure. EPIC FAILURE (KL- I kid:)) I go to bed angry and sad.

I wake up with a new message on Twitter. I see who it is and call Nick while I read:

Can I come over and help this afternoon? Of course, yes, of course. 

Oh fucking hell. Evan. Is awesome. And home with me right now because summer camp is still 2 weeks away. Honey? Can you leave work RIGHT NOW??? No? But she wants me to come today and I can't bring Evan. You really can't leave? Okay. Yeah. I'll figure it out.

You might remember from my last post that we don't dine out w/out our little cherub because we don't have a sitter. I have not often cared much. Missing a show is no big deal. The idea of missing the chance to work for the Lefebvres is bringing me to tears. I try everyone I know to see if I can drop him off for a few hours. No, no, no and no.

Out of luck and totally desperate I have the conversation with Evan that begins "If you're good, I......" and ends with me promising him ice cream for every meal and a few hundred more pieces of plastic. He has a Nintendo DS that he will play for hours at a time if I let him so I pin every hope I have on that and the baby Jesus and off we go.

I wish you all could see the look on Ludo's face when he opens the door and sees a strange lady and a child on his porch.  Priceless! I come in, briefly explain the lack of childcare and swear that Evan will be a perfect angel who will sit on the couch entertaining himself with the fully loaded backpack we have.... now dumped all over the floor thank you Evan.

It is to Krissy's credit that she doesn't bat an eye and points me to the kitchen table. I sweat buckets, praying that Evan will be good while she shows me what we're doing when I hear, Krissy, I have a DS.
OMGOMGOMG please don't you dare.

I have Lego Batman and Lego Star Wars. Do you like Star Wars.

You could add up the five most horrifying times of my life and wipe them off my shoe with this one.

Under the breath, clenching the teeth. Be good Evan, you promised. Just sit and color and don't ask questions.

Let's just fast forward to the part where he is reclined on the couch watching Twilight and I am wanting to kill myself.

next up - Excel Master. Nick Saves The Day.