How many 20 year-old males does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They sit in the dark until someone else does it for them.
Our maintenance man Josh has rather large holes in each earlobe and I am afraid that his brains are leaking out. He was under the sink yesterday trying to explain to me that you really shouldn't put cooked rice down the garbage disposal. You know. Since it EXPANDS (according to some physics that he must be the only one studying) and therefore is one of the worst disposal offenders of all. Huh?????
I must be new, I must not be a chef and most of all I must not have had a garbage disposal EVER in the past 43 years. How else could I be so unaware that the softest food in the world is more deadly to the gears than say, lemon peels, which is what is recommended as a freshener of sorts to your stinking hole.
There is nothing you can point out to this fine specimen of white American stupidity and laziness that he will concede needs fixing. The gap between the frig door and it's seal? Can't be fixed, according to him. How about a new seal? Nope, won't fit. New frig? Sorry honey, you is broke now and no longer live at the Hyatt. The blue crap leaking out the back to show the toilet is leaking? That's just a few drops, he says and goes back to the nothing that he gets paid to do all day.
It's an epidemic, I'm afraid. The 20-something white American child who feels entitled to a steady paycheck for bothering to send a resume or two in between downloading Muse or Spirit or Gay English Boys in Skinny Jeans or whatever the Jesus they listen to.
I know I am officially old now, but I also know that at no other time in American history has the young male population gotten away with being such useless asshats and you know I'm right so what are we to do folks? What are we to do?